Is he really absent?

Being a single parent is EXTREMELY hard!  Sometimes it is a choice other times…NOT SO MUCH.  I’ve been a single mother and it’s not easy. BUT I’ve also had the support of my children’s fathers one way or the other.

I recently saw a meme on either Facebook or Instagram (I can’t remember) and when I saw it the first thing that crossed my mind was, “This is a sad but a true reflection of so many households.”  I continued to scroll without liking because although it is a true reflection of MANY households, it is not MY reality, therefore NO LIKE FROM ME!

Before I get to the main reason for waking up in the middle of the night with this darn meme on my mind and the urge to write…I also know women that are living that meme.  The meme is a true depiction of their past or current situations; whether the father be ordered to pay child support and doesn’t or the father doesn’t pick up his child when he says he will and disappoints the child time and time again, so much so that the child no longer becomes excited because he/she knows disappointment will follow. A woman in this situation may very well like the meme and has every right to do so, as it is her reality.

BUT, there is gonna be that BITTER BITCH that will tag her “Baby Daddy” on that meme because he has moved on and is no longer with her and she’s in her feelings; she’s trying to drag him because she is miserable with herself; or she’s just trying to get a negative reaction from the father.  If this is you, YOU ARE LAME!

Let’s take a look at the definition of absent and absentee parent.  ABSENT – (adjective) not present in a place, at an occasion, or as part of something. Hmmmmmmm! ABSENTEE PARENT – is a parent who either wanders in and out of the child’s life, is inconsistent, one who was an active part of their child’s life before abruptly CEASING (putting an end to) contact, or a parent who has never been involved in the life of their child. HMMMMMMMM!

If a father IS in fact not only paying child support but spending time with his child, is he absent? Mind you, absent means not a part of something.

This goes to those women that are gonna screenshot that meme and send it to their child’s ACTIVE father or tag him on FB or IG:

Sis,

If your child’s father is in his/her life, Sis, he is NOT absent.  No matter how hard you try to make him look bad, Sis, the man is present! LOL!  You are just bitter because he chose to leave, you chased him away, or simply let him go.  But also, SIS, you can’t fault a man if you refuse to let him see his child.  Stop being CHILDISH and making everything about you, SIS! Your child will be better off if you put your bitter ass feelings to the side and allow that father to step up (if he’s willing) and be a father to his child.  There are so many things that we as women cannot show or give our children like their fathers.  Little girls need their daddies to teach them how women should be treated.  Little boys need their daddies to teach them how to be men…WE CAN’T DO THAT! So, Sis, put on your BIG GIRL PANTIES and let that man be a father to his child and stop trying to guilt trip him because YOU in fact are the guilty party! Guilty of keeping your child away from his/her father. Guilty of holding onto the past. Guilty of manipulation. Guilty of being a selfish, evil, bitter HAG! GET OVER YOURSELF!

Sincerely,

~ Elle

Found it!